Pictures from January

This two pictures are ICU on the 15th January after 9 hours down the operating theatre.

Here I am all smiles 3 days later, what operation?

I must of been in no pain here.

Its quite nice to see such a large smile on my face I must have managed to stay awake longer than 20 minutes. Apparently when hubby and friends came I kept falling asleep on them. I would be in the middle of a conversation then go back to sleep wake up and finish what I was saying. (So I've been told)

You can see my lump, One warning I will give, do not push yourself up the bed on your bum dragging your back up the matteress, thats what I did and I think this is why I have a lump. I actually thought I had a bandage for protection but I was pulling at the staples, my own fault then! The other you can see how far the scar comes round and obviously one of the drains left in position. This is the one that caused me so much pain and I think is still the reason my left breast still hurts so much. If I hadn't had such a long body the drain would have been in a better position. Guess it would have helped if I didn't have so many drain sites from before

Your probably wondering why I am showing you these, I don't quite know myself but if you are planning to go through the operation you know what is to come and I honestly think it makes you stronger. I knew how bad the drains would be from previous surgery, I thought I knew how bad the operation was going to be but I under estimated how bad it was going to be. Yet here I am 6 months later, 6 months that I wouldn't have had.

My life is still mine, you all know I was back at work long before expected to be, yes I still suffer with pain but pain lets you know your alive and as long as you can deal with the pain the sun always shines because your still here

I always promised I would be truthful about pain, discomfort and life and to this day I have remained so. If you are contemplating this operation, and I seriously hope the majority of you are, look at these and tell yourself you will be like this and come through the otherside better than me.

One last word, everyone has a different pain threshold and some people may recover without too much pain in 2 months, others may take longer, but you have nothing to lose if your meso is in a position to let you have it removed.