Although I had my scan on Tuesday in the back of my mind I knew the results would be in by Friday, so I ignored the fact. I knew when the phone rang about 6.15 on Friday it was my GP. The scan is in, things aren't great, apply for a copy straight away. He will print out a copy of the Radiologist's report and leave it for me to collect. Would we like to talk about it, is there anything I can do? You all know how the conversations go, although most have a team in place to help them through these times, once again its just hubby, GP's and me.
I wasn't shocked to hear that the radiotherapy has done nothing to stop the mass that is growing outwardly, indeed I joked the other day about having to buy a bra filler for the right to even me up. I wonder if the mass is more like those solid fibrous type than the baked beans type I had removed along with the rest of my chest. Strange though, because I feel really good and I do mean good. My pain down my left side seems to have settled into mild discomfort, my tin box inside my left side is only annoying when I get up, the only thing that has been painful or maybe more annoying is my new mass, I may need to think of a name for this one - following in Debbie's shoes here - but to me its not really my meso as my meso is inside my chest not outside! I suppose 'My 3rd Boob' would be appropriate considering where it is residing. As for the rest it sounds like the invasion in my right side is continuing and the left is growing, I don't know whether its in numbers or just size. Some thickening continuing around the pericardium (false one in my case). He did tell me that some are showing slow progress, well that's a relief!
Even harder for me to understand is how the radiologist knows that 'My 3rd Boob' hasn't responded considering I didn't have a scan before radiotherapy and he had done my last scan in July - only a few weeks before this appeared. Had it shown up on the Scan and he didn't report on it? Has my 4cm square become 5. I know its heavy as my boob has a new substance about it and I do wish it was me putting on weight.
Typical, I finally come through the pain of the surgery and get lumbered with something else. This meso is becoming more strategic than I anticipated.
Even with such news we had a wonderful weekend again and nothing was going to spoil it.
I had forgotten it was bonfire night and hubby decided we would have our own big family party, Bear, Lexi and us. He prepared our bonfire in our burning bin, planted fireworks in various spots around the garden, we made curried parsnip soup, followed by hot dogs and BBQ spare ribs. Bear wasn't bothered about the few bangs from the fire works but spent most of the time running round the kitchen at times looking for the lights that had shot up from the ground. The noise doesn't affect either of the dogs, which I must say I am so pleased about. It was also the first time it didn't rain on bonfire night for many a year.
Today we went to Seal Sands and watched the local inhabitants battle it out for the love of a woman
These two males were fighting for the affections of the female in the background. She preferred the one at the front and kept nudging his wounds every time the other one hurt him. I think we spent about 30 minutes watching and snapping photos. Hubby has become a really keen photographer and is trying to teach me .. Good luck with that.To you all, keep living life - no matter how hard it gets remember something to make you smile.
1 comment:
so sorry to hear about the scan, these things always seem to raise more questions. As you say I don't understand how they make judgements when you don't know what baseline they are using.
it dose make you realise with meso , that there is still so much they don't understand about it. i always think that brings hope as well
glad you enjoyed bonfire night
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