Thursday, 8 August 2013

Healing Circle - Unbelievable

I went to see my GP yesterday to renew the water tablets and have a chat.  My GP has been wonderful since starting the practice, he has gone out of his way to help me through the meso and has promised to be my back bone as we move forward into another journey.  He never met me when I was originally diagnosed, he joined the group just before my surgery in 2009.
 
He checked the computer, still no discharge papers from Darlington.  I told him I had seen Dr Vish and Friday I was having my stomach reduced.  He isn't happy that I went the private route but understood the way I felt about this lump out front.
 
I talked about the future, who would help me through the decision of choosing between Dr Steele, Dr S or Prof Fennell.  He told me he would.  Although he wants me to try and get back in touch with my old oncologist Dr Hughes, he was private when I saw him, but now back on the NHS.  My doc thinks it would be a good idea to go through things with him too. 
 
I think my Doc is hoping that St Barts or Leicester may talk my current oncologist into trying a different chemo, good luck with that!  I said it would be better if I could have treatment up here than have to travel to London or Leicester and have it.  He mentioned that due to trusts and funding that may be difficult, so I said well I can always pay for it.  He said I shouldn't have to pay privately for a treatment to keep me alive, I have already paid out quite a lot over the years and the insurance paid for my second round of chemo.  Of course the first round was free as it was on trial.  I would pay anything to keep me alive and so would hubby.
 
From the doctors I went straight to healing.  I haven't been since long before our last cruise, so it was great catching up with the ladies.  Three have read my book and were telling me how much they enjoyed it, even though vampires were things they would never normally read.  I was told off by one because she said she couldn't put it down for 2 days and didn't get any house work done!  I was pleased, in fact I was beaming with the praise.
 
We went into the service room and the atmosphere was electric.   Myra and Shirley have both worked on me together for a long time and it was the same yesterday.  As I sat waiting I thought of all those with meso and especially Lou, Tom and Esther at the moment.  I could feel tingling long before I sat for healing.  I can't say what I felt apart from I did feel someone wiggle my nose.  From somewhere deep I had a feeling of peace start and it came out over.  Tears fell from my eyes yet I wasn't upset or felt like crying.  It was if my soul had been touched and lifted.
 
When we asked for the energy created to be used on others I sent mine as always to those who I know with meso by name and then the meso community.  I truly hope many of you felt the peace that I did yesterday around 2.30.
 
As we sat watching TV last night I attempted to groom Bear's under bits - not a chance!  My mug of tea was down by my side as I was trying to get those knots out under his back leg but he got up, sniffed my mug and I lost my tea!  I have to put a towel under the mug otherwise he splashes it everywhere!  Sometimes he can go for weeks without bothering then suddenly he wants every cup I have.  Our Jagar (Bless her) used to love my coffee, no cup was ever safe.

My Mug or Bear's Mug?


My stomach seemed smaller last night but I forgot to take the water tablet and this morning its looking a little more squashy!  I am still not hungry although I did manage a tuna sandwich and soup last night, not really enough to keep me going but at least it is something.  I felt extremely full by the time I finished it.  I jumped on the scales this morning, I weight 9.8, so I haven't lost a great deal, 6 lbs in total.  Makes me think the fluid is getting heavier as I haven't really eaten properly now for 3 weeks.
 
Mavis has done well with the protest but still needs more people involved, visit her website for details.  One last piece of sad news, Linda (ADAO) was burgled - they took those things that can never be replaced, jewellery her beloved husband had bought her, including his wedding band.  I hate these low lives.  Sentimental value is worth more than any £ or $ that they would get to probably feed a habit.  I just hope that saying works "What goes around comes around".
 
Well on that note I had better get moving.  I'm going into work and hopefully get a few hours in.  The sun looks like it may stay this morning, not much of a breeze but plenty of floating grey clouds.
 
To all those involved with mesothelioma I hope this ray of sunshine lifts you today.



2 comments:

amanda said...

your story about Bear and the tea made me laugh- I used to have a cat that loved coffee and it was always a fight to drink my morning cup!

Hope everything goes well with the stomach opp- I have a squashy stomach but mine is just fat!!

wishing you all the best
Amanda

Anonymous said...

I am a medical resident in California and came across your site looking for path specimen pics for mesothelioma. I am deeply impressed with how you have managed your condition. Well done and best of luck!