Friday 29 October 2010

Where have I Been

Time has flown and for once I haven't been offline because I have been ill, instead I have thrown myself into my new duties at work.  Although I have been suffering and am putting it down to far to many hours spent over the computer.

I had some sad news recently from John E (my surgeon) who lost his pet Rufus while on holiday.  My heart goes out to him and his family, if there is nothing worse than losing a member of the family it is loosing your fully fledged member of the family (your pet). 

My meso mate down country has let me know about a trial she may be participating in, my fingers and toes and anything else I can cross will be as we need more on the market but trials always seem to have the habit of dying out before they get started or we hear no more about them.

I also heard that the Action Day was exceptional this year with many people being unable to attend due to lack of tickets.  In one way that is really great but in another really sad as that means there are more out there with this terrible cancer.

I managed to finally get my written report which had loads of medical references but nothing that I could get excited about either way.  Yes there is changes, no they aren't sure of what, yes recurrence but remains static.  Hum, haven't had the scan and Dr Abtin is desperate to view it.

I also have Karen's story to get published and owe her many apologies and today hubby found a report about another new chemo going on trial.  He has requested further information and once we receive it I will get that up and loaded too.

Better get back to my drawing board, hopefully John has opened the doors and found a new member of the family to adopt and keep him fit after hours of being slouched over our bodies in theatre or over his desk reading reports!

Keep well everyone, and thanks to BB for leaving a comment about indigestion remedies, I certainly will be giving it a try, this pain is now lasting 24/7 without going, even morphine is just dulling it for a couple of hours.

Jan

Sunday 10 October 2010

Back to Earth

Haven't had much good news since arriving home, one of my meso mates isn't getting anywhere yet with treatments for the return of his meso.  It seems Dr Abtin can't help as there are too many patches, guess it would be extremely expensive and dangerous trying to freeze the entire area, and I feel quite bad about it as I thought cryo would keep on top of such a return.

After having such a wonderful week of hardly any pain the first morning back in our own bed brought on aches, so hubby swapped our beds around and we have moved the tempo one out and brought back in our soft one.  I must admit it is much more gentler on the bones but still have pain.  The heart\throat indigestion feeling is much worse here too.  Have started to wonder if it is indigestion really as am drinking glasses of milk before bedtime and it doesn't seem to help.

On a bright note, we had a wonderful time in Dubai and it was great meeting up with Benet and Jeff, this is Benet and myself after a rather filling meal at Junsi.

Since coming back I haven't had much time to myself as I have been busy at work.  On Wednesday I didn't feel that good and I had visions of the last time we were on holiday and ending up in hospital for the night but it passed.  So I stayed home and worked in the new cosy office, only to get started and we had a power cut from 11am till 8.30.  Our neighbour came to our rescue and fed us with warm soup and a casserole (we are all electric now, not even a gas ring to help).  So not much done but it gave me a chance to wind down.

The thought of the long drawn out winter ahead is making me feel low.  Hubby said lets buy the Euro lottery tickets and if we won we could buy a private jet and take you off every weekend to the sun .... what a wonderful dream but in my life nothing has ever come easy so I doubt we would ever win big, we did win £6.80 on Friday's (a far cry from enough to buy a private jet that can take you when you want infact I don't think it would pay for a return ticket to Darlington).

I hear the Carer's day went really well and many people were unable to get tickets, these events are good for getting out what is going on, yet it still seems not much is being done in the way of treatments for meso.  Which reminds me I still haven't had my scan results from August or a copy to send out.  I can only hope and pray it is fine.

When you feel rough you do imagine the worst, yet meso can be growing and you feel no different.  A point Hilary brought up the other day, how come it can be so slow growing then suddenly change into a rapid aggressive cancer? 

I am being distracted as I have put some bird seed on the window sill and as I am sitting here writing I have 3 sparrows, one blue tit and a green finch all nibbling at the seed, two sparrows are fighting as one won't let the others in!

Think I had better go and fill up the bird feeders to save bloodshed on the windowsill. 

Keep safe and well

Jan