Thursday, 19 November 2009

Up and Down

I decided to take myself off on one of these healing weeks, I actually managed the drive of 4 hours down the road and still felt good, a miracle in itself, although I did have company in the car.  The first night I was extremely shattered but the accommodation was that of the 1940's and I had a single bed which I duly fell out of during the night.  The building is said to be haunted, the haunting I had was my room mate snoring! 

I did find it tiring and sitting for long periods of time was quite hard on the side, Monday night I found I cat napped and so Tuesday the pain started building up.  We had a full energy healing session on the Tuesday evening, everyone laid on the floor for 45 minutes and the energies were given out (don't ask), as I laid there I felt my ribs get tighter and my chest feel constricted.  An hour later I found myself in bed tired but catnapping. The bed was uncomfortable which didn't help and I just started regretting being away from home.

Wednesday I still felt achy and the thought of holding out without sleep for another couple of days was going to do me more bad than good so having found a lift for my companion I jumped ship.

I was nervous as once I started that drive home on my own I would have to continue as there would be no coming back.  I've never driven more than 30 minutes on my own since the meso started and the thought had my adrenaline flowing like there was no tomorrow.  I pressed the button on satnav to get me back as I knew I wouldn't be able to map read and drive at the same time.  On the way down we had hit double round abouts with 1st exit and 3rd exits which ran into another roundabout, you get the picture, not where you want to mess up on then, I had travelled the M11, A14 and I think A120 once off the A1.  The Satnav worked out a total different route to the one I travelled down on and added an extra hour to my 4 hour journey, it took me all the winding roads to the A1. Then the A1M was shut at Junction 35, panic struck I turned onto the M18 heading to Hull and rang home, where do I go off the M18, head for Leeds on the M62 then back onto the A1.  did the Sat nav want to do that, no, thankfully because I rang home I knew he was right and the satnav was wrong!

I am so proud of myself for making that journey home, my side was tight, but the adrenaline kept me going and I arrived home 4.45 hours later, tired, achy but elated.

When you have something like this, debulked or not, those around you don't realise how dependent you become on them and to be honest you don't realise how dependent you become yourself.  I have given myself a gold star for making the decision to leave, I don't know whether I would have felt better if I had stayed but for once I knew I couldn't take the chance on staying and maybe the pain escalating because at the end of the day I was still the driver and would have had to drive home with the added responsibility of someone else in the car and the possibility of having a more pained journey.

Did the healing work?  Well I'll leave that up to you to decide.

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