Tuesday, 1 June 2010


Over the start from creating this blog and the website I have become friendly with quite a lot of meso sufferers, which I affectionately call my meso circle, and I know that many of these people have created their own meso circles, which all helps to promote awareness of the cancer and the treatments we can have or what is experimental etc.  Over this time you create a bond with each other and become virtual friends which I think is wonderful.  Sometimes it may not be the sufferer who you become friendly with but their partner. 

Last year I got to know Hilary, her husband is unfortunate enough to suffer from meso and over the year we have emailed and supported each other (as best you can on a keyboard).  Last week Hilary gave me the bad news that her husband had yet again contacted a chest infection and oxygen was now a requirement at home.  My heart was heavy at this news and this week his condition has taken a further knocking and at present he is spending time in a hospice.  I find that when one of the meso circle is taken ill I feel it like an acute pain, why is this happening, isn't there something the Doctors can do etc.  I know that we should get use to this but I just can't and it brings home the fact that we should be counting our blessings everyday for the time we are here. 

I find it frustrating because there is nothing I can do that can help and I feel sad because I live so far away that I am unable to visit, it brings a heaviness to my heart that one of us is ill and we all know the risks involved when we do take ill.  How a chest infection can lead to hospitalisation, how a scan result can mean another cycle of chemo. 

Our partners battle through this illness with us, not only giving us support but love and encouragement, we show strength so as not to worry them but our loved ones can have a much harder emotional battle going on than we the sufferers have. 

I guess I want you all to send a thought out to Hilary and her husband to let her know we are here routing for the both of them and wishing a miracle could take place.

I find it strange that it takes years and years for this cancer to come to life and in some cases like mine can take years of slow growing.  So why does it suddenly change and accelerate in growth for no reason.  All we can hope is that we are strong enough to fight it and hopefully have some form of treatment available for when this happens, but we all know that we don't have enough treatments out there.  Once we get to the ill position we can't travel so Prof V or Dr Abtin don't come into the equation and perhaps its the same for the few treatments we do have like radiotherapy.  

Which leads me back to seeding, please please if you have had a VAT or drains in your chest please please ask for radiotherapy, infact push for it.  Specialists say there is no evidence that it helps prevent growth but I know quite a few people who didn't have it and have suffered with seeding, which then leads to other problems as well as the meso spreading.  

As I close this blog please send your thoughts to Hilary and her husband and to your friends who are battling at this time.

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