Sunday, 9 May 2010

Full of Bugs

The week has flown by, work was busy and I ended up working everyday till at least 2.30, and even started earlier, never later than 9.00.  Yesterday we were going to look for light fittings for the extension (that hasn't progressed and is in the same state we left it 2 weeks ago).  I didn't feel right but thought "Once we get out I'd be ok", no such avoiding hubby's scrutiny he knew I wasn't right so instead he turned me round and sent me for a lie down.

I emerged some 2 hours later, but I didn't feel right.  After tea still felt a little off but put it down to lack of fresh air, it has been so windy here that I know my breath wouldn't reach my lungs in it.  Got to bed and for the first time in a long while I was scared, I felt terrible but didn't know why then I started throwing up, I didn't dare climb into bed for fear of throwing up all over so stayed by the toilet freezing for quite a while.  When I did climb into bed but I felt like my lungs couldn't get enough air into them, my stomach was producing adrenaline, my head was pounding and I just wanted to roll over.  It brought me back to the first few days of surgery. 

You know that if you can sleep through it you will feel better and time is a wonderful healer, but telling yourself that and being able to do it isn't always easy.  I couldn't settle, I seemed to be up and down every hour peeing and my ribs ached.  The blood from vomiting was all I could taste and this uneasy feeling.  I got out of bed at 9.30 and came downstairs, I had  a drink then turned round and went back to bed.  Noon was when I finally surfaced but still feel off.  I know it will be a bug of some sorts, plus my nose is now streaming, but it was frightening.  We are human and can come into contact with normal illness but I can't every remember feeling this rotten even with a cold.  All I hope is that tomorrow I will feel better.

I hope by tomorrow the worst is over but my temp is still 36.1, funny how I always go down when I'm ill, I use to go right down to 34.1 when the meso kicked off and was once told this was impossible .. well seems the impossible always happens to me.  I did have a fear thought of the meso was starting to do nasty things, after all it will be a new ball game for me when it does, I have no idea how the pain or the symptoms will show themselves as all the old areas have been removed ... just hope and pray that that is a long way off before I need to think that way.

Hope this bug doesn't catch up with any of you guys, I truly believe I have man flu for the first time in my life, I really can't be bothered to do anything or want to.

No comments: