Friday, 1 November 2013


It has been a hard few days for a good friend of mine in the States.  Waiting for news across the time zone is exceedingly hard and all you can do is wait and hope.  Unfortunately the news was not good yesterday and my friends husband succumbed to the fate of mesothelioma.
At the moment the community is loosing so many dear people they have become friends with through this cyber platform.  We feel the pain and the agony when the news is bad but the lift and celebration when good news follows scans results or surgery gives us a lift.  Yes, it is hard knowing what is going on but then it can be helpful too.
I am still shocked at how fast the turn around from healthy to seriously ill can happen.  This is the danger with mesothelioma and the importance of scans over Xrays.  Although some scans aren't always read correctly either or the information isn't passed on.
I have to admit this morning I feel a lot brighter, after having a terrible morning again yesterday, coughing up green dark gunk with an effort and leaving me grasping for breath to this morning where I am starting to feel more like Jan again.  I am pleased I ordered that little oxygen, just a few breaths of it yesterday got me through the after effects of rattling my ribs and being unable to get my breathing under control.
I even managed to carve out a pumpkin along with Gary and we sat them outside on the wall, watching their faces flicker all night.
This has become a yearly routine for us since moving here, I don't know two overgrown children still making them, but we do have fun.  Something to share.  Bear wasn't sure what we were making, trying to sniff the worktop for food!
I think my meso has stopped growing again, this could be wishful thinking but the sweats have stopped and the fluid has reduced dramatically over the last couple of days, I am hopeful as we say we don't understand this disease but only our bodies.
Well November has started, this time last year I was going for my first dose of cycle 3 chemo.  And boy did it work, I remember being in agony all night as the chemo worked its way into every cell of my cancer.  I haven't had a date yet for the renewed appointment, I only hope that Mr Hughes secretary was able to contact the correct department and cancel yesterday.
I am due back at the physio today, since going the pain when passing water has gone, obviously still something to do with my trapped L4-L5 nerve, he has done a good job and I will continue seeing him a little longer, just to ensure it doesn't come back.  One thing I do have though is the drain is resting on a nerve and it does cause a strange tingling sensation when it moves, especially in the bladder region.  Can't have it all ways.
I have nothing more to write today, I am still saddened by the death of Tom and I wish I could be with Lisa and her family right now, for no other reason that to give her a big hug.  She has been there for many of us on facebook, digging up so much information and research on USA trials and different drug effects.  I would think she will now back away from this scene for a while, everyone needs a break when losing the one they love.  It amazes me they come back and are willing to help give support to those of us who are still fighting.


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